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7/22/2020 0 Comments

Pandemic 2020 and Time Travel

While it must be said that I adore historical fiction and am as fascinated by the timeless rogue in the kilt as any other, I have never longed to live in any other time period than present—despite current events,

That being said, this is what Pandemic 2020 has taught me about potential time travel:

Let’s start with the toilet paper hoarding. Obviously, I could not travel back further than 1857 because that was year the cleaning sheets were created by a New York entrepreneur named Joseph Gayetty. He claimed his sheets prevented hemorrhoids. I guess no one cared whether that was fact or not. But it wasn’t until 1890 when the paper found the roll and took off as some may say.

And let’s be honest, the indoor water closet wasn’t a “thing” until mid last century at any rate, so I’d be limited to the last 75-years of time travel exploits.

But I digress…

Aside from modern convenience, I have no transferable skills. Let’s face it…I’m not going to be royalty or upper class, so where does that leave me … milking cows? I’d likely not even make it to the kitchen help. 

What would we do with no internet? Certainly, without spellcheck, I’m likely illiterate. Never mind mathematical skills or basic map navigation. So, there’d I’d be walking in circles never able to reach my destination without Google Maps or Siri. You never find those time travel stones in the middle of city centre after all.
 
We’ve given up the ability to do for ourselves, growing our own food, raising chickens, etc. What no skip the dish? I’m out.

Just keeping a house would be fundamentally frustrating with no Windex or basic cleaning tools. Vinegar and water, eh. No scrubbing bubbles then? How about my washer and dryer? The dishwasher would be me, ouch. I guess that’s a no go for the leftovers in the microwave. And absolutely no complaining, because let’s not forget, women had no rights.

What on Earth would I do without my moisturizing soap, cream, wax strips. I am reminded of the bug population and would be lost without my Off spray. 

Evenings by candlelight and no Netflix. I guess nighttime entertainment would be my trust butter churn and certainly no Apple tunes to keep me motivated and on task. I can just feel the tap of my foot fading away. 

Think about how much time we spend writing on all our various platforms a day. If we could even find paper and quill, messing with the ink and blotter, we’d be lucky to share out a post a week IF we could get it to the printer between chores and the ability to find a mode of travel.
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Yes, we may have gone through months of isolation and a big pity party, but we are still incredibly spoiled in comparison to our ancestral generations. We have more than one room to move around in, plenty to entertain and distract, and considerable convenience to make it all bareable.

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